Playing Well

I had to “play well” at work today. By this, I mean that I had to pretend I wasn’t sick. I know…..strange, right? We are so used to pretending to be sick to get a day off? Who has to play well? Well, I do, because my boss is a germaphobe reminiscent of Niles Crane ala Frasier.

I came to work feeling pretty bad but knowing if I didn’t I would be too overwhelmed tomorrow to get anything done. I still have not caught up since my pseudovacation in October. I don’t know why it is, but if I have a little work, a little gets done. If I have a lot of work, a lot gets done. If I have an overwhelmingly impossible amount of work, I freeze and NOTHING gets done. I will actually sit and stare at the work, not knowing where to start until I spend about four hours triaging paperwork into must do, need to do and can wait until hell freezes over piles. I want to avoid this at all costs.

That is why I came in sick today. Because yesterday my boss sent me home. Don’t worry, he was nice about it. I left at 1pm. I decided that I felt like crap and was too hungry to drive the 40 minutes home on the interstate, so I was going to pick up some food beforehand and eat it on the way home. Did you know that you can literally drive for hours in any one direction in Pennsylvania and not find a fast food restaurant? It’s true.

I drove for about 20 minutes and didn’t find a drive-thru so I turned around and went in another direction. I just kept doing this, driving and turning around, refusing to get on the interstate and go home where I knew where the fast food restaurants are. It became my stubborn mission. I know you are probably saying, you don’t know where the fast food restaurants are by your work? No. No I don’t. Sue me.

Anyway, I finally found a Burger King, got some food, and drove home. I got there at 3:30. Still feeling crappy.

So I sat around watched 3 hours of some stupid bat cartoon with my son to keep him quiet because I just didn’t have the energy to chase him around. Then this morning came the decision. Go to work? Stay home? I knew I needed to go to work. I have always been trained to go to work, sick or not. So I came to work.

“How are you, Sherri?” my boss asked.

“I feel much better, thank you,” I replied as I stifled a cough.

Do you know how hard it is not to sniff in front of someone when you can feel mucus sliding down your face? It’s really horrible.

So anyway, the day is almost over. I am going to go home and collapse. My poor kids are going to get whatever frozen treat I microwave for them again tonight. I guess I’ll make up for it with vitamins and milk. Milk’s the perfect food, right?

So anyway, tomorrow I promise I will have something to write about other than vomit, throw up or being sick!

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On a different note: Did you know that Dentyne has “Vanilla Ice” gum? What’s sad is I actually bought it and then realized I had bought something with “Vanilla Ice” on it.

"But mine’s different," he said. "It goes dum da da dum da da DA dum."