Corporate Paranoia

As I’ve mentioned before I work in the IT industry. IT is an ever-changing environment. You have to constantly upgrade your skills or you will be left behind.

The changes also include staff. It seems normal for IT professionals to change jobs quite often. It is one of the few fields where several jobs with short tenure on a resume aren’t considered bad.

This also leads to paranoia among managers.

One of my co-workers was sick a few days ago. She had a migraine headache. Everyone assumed she was on a job interview. I knew this, but when I decided to tease her about it I was unaware of all the grief she had already received.

(Walking up to coworkers desk)

Me: So how was your job interview yesterday?

Co-worker: OHMIGOD!! If one more person asks me that I am going to totally freak out!

Me: Um….so I’m not the first person to mention this, huh?

Co-worker: No. Try about the sixth.

Me: Wow. I was just teasing, you know.

Co-worker: I know. I’m sorry. It’s just frustrating when you can’t even have a migraine without everyone thinking you are doing something shady.

Me: Would looking for another job actually be shady?

Co-worker: (Moment of realization) Well, no…..I guess not.

Me: But you’re made to feel like you would be doing something wrong if you went on a job interview. (My psychology degree rearing its ugly head).

Co-worker: Yeah. Always.

Me: You know, maybe the level of concern here about people going on job interviews is indicative of the actual corporate climate. (Using my big words). I mean, if the company felt like they were doing everything for their employees and giving them opportunities to advance in their careers then maybe they wouldn’t worry so much.

(FYI – This person was passed over for a promotion that she was totally qualified for and the position has been open for several months while the company spends time and money looking for the “perfect” fit.)

Co-worker: That’s true. I guess they are probably worried that I am unhappy.

Me: Aren’t you? You have to at least be frustrated with the current situation?

Co-worker: I am. Maybe we should do something to f*ck with them. What can we do?

(More FYI – This person ALWAYS dresses really casual at work and doesn’t wear makeup.)

Co-worker: I know. I’ll come in wearing a dress, heels and makeup. And then leave early for a “doctor’s appointment”.

Me: Yeah and I can let it slip that I hope you have good luck at your “j…uh, doctor’s appointment”.

Co-worker: That will be so funny.

(She thinks for a moment)

Co-worker: Do you think they’ll fire me?

Me: I wouldn’t think they could. Guess we’ll find out.

So this is really sad, huh? This isn’t an isolated incident either. Almost everyone who takes an unplanned day off is accused of going on a job interview. As soon as it gets around that they aren’t in, the rumors start flying:

Do you think they are going to leave? I know they haven’t been happy. Maybe they just want more money. Did you hear about the fight they had with their manager?

This isn’t unnoticed by management either. It is an epidemic that is running rampant in our office.

So here’s my take on it:

If everyone appears so unhappy that management has to be utterly paranoid every time someone takes a day of… why don’t they do something about it?

How much would it take to make employees happy? How much effort would you have to expend to sit down with a direct report and discuss career goals and opportunities? How much money would be saved by promoting from within and recruiting entry-level candidates versus spending an obscene amount of money on headhunters for high-level workers?

I don’t know. Doesn’t make much sense to me. But I’m only the Master’s level educated secretary. What do I know?

*Yes, I am aware that my bitterness and self-pity are showing - deal with it!